Story of My Life: Don't Hate on a Lefty!

Hi guys!

I'm sure that after quite a long hiatus you were hoping for a blog post with a little bit more substance than me talking about myself ;) Well, life is not all hearts and roses, is it? :)

On a a side note, my close friend (Hi, Mick!!) reads the blog and she has told me that it offers a good insight into who I am in real life with one exception: in real life my jokes are even more cynical, so please keep that in mind when you judge me ;)

a hiatus – przerwa (a break)

substance – znaczenie (importance)

on a side note – na marginesie (by the way)

an insight into – wgląd (understanding)

to keep something in mind – pamiętać o czymś (to remember about something)

Moving on to today's topic. You might not like it or believe it but I am and have always been left-handed. I have already shared with you that I can't draw but I thought this priceless piece of information deserved a separate post. (I hope everybody feels the sarcasm here.) ;)

Left-handed people get all kinds of different reactions – from “you must be really intelligent to “no wonder you are so weird and slow on the uptake”.

no wonder – nic dziwnego (it's not surprising that)

slow on the uptake – ciężko kojarzący (If someone is slow on the uptake they understand things with difficulty)

If you're a lefty yourself – high five and if you're not – well, then you should read what follows carefully. If you're ambidextrous, go and brag somewhere else ;)

Being a lefty is hard work. Why? Because everything on this planet seems to be constructed for right-handed people – scissors, bags, cars, the idea of writing …

We, lefties, do manage of course, but it does drive us up the wall when, for the millionth time, we have to explain to you, right-handed people, why we wear our watches on our right wrist or why all our clothes face the right side of the closet.

what follows – co następuje ( the following … )

ambidextrous – oburęczny (able to use both hands equally well)

to brag – chwalić się (to speak too proudly about what you have done or what you own)

to manage – radzić sobie (to succeed)

to drive somebody up the wall – wkurzać kogoś (to annoy somebody)

to face – być zwróconym w stronę (be turned towards something)

Also, most people are right-handed and when they explain to you how some manual thing is done, they say how a right-handed person would do it. And then, when a lefty gives it a go and needs a little bit more time to figure it out, they call him slow. Now, how fair is it?

manual – ręczny (done with the hands)

to figure something out – rozpracować (to work something out)

Left-handed people often need to pretend that other people's jokes don't hurt their feelings:

Young student: How do you eat?

Me: What do you mean?

Young student: Do you hold the knife in you right hand and fork in your left hand, like normal people do?

Me: Yep, that's a pretty basic skill, even for me ;)

Young student: <disappointed>

Me: But I do hold the spoon in my left hand.

Young student: :)

What do you mean? – Co masz na myśli?

Lefties might feel bashful when the subject of handwriting pops up in a conversation:

Searching for a perfect font.

Friend: Or we could use your own signature instead.

Me: ?

Friend: And then make an electronic version of it. What's your handwriting like?

Me: Oh, we don't want to go there. I write like a five-year-old. You should see the signature on my ID.

Friend: Oh, ok. Never mind then.

bashful – wstydliwy zakłopotany (often feeling uncomfortable with other people and easily embarrassed; shy)

a font – czcionka

a signature – podpis

We don't want to go there. – To nie jest dobry pomysł/ Lepiej tego nie róbmy. (It's not a good idea/ Let's not do it.)

Never mind – mniejsza o to, nieważne (forget about it)

Left-handed people are often treated less seriously compared to people their age who are right-handed:

Someone: You look so cute and awkward when you write.

Me: Gee, thanks.

Someone: Oh, I think your left hand is dirty.

Me: It's alright. It's just smudged with ink. Happens all the time.

compared with – w porównaniu z

look awkward – wyglądać nieporadnie, niezdarnie (moving in a way that is not attractive)

gee – jejku (an expression of surprise or enthusiasm)

smudged with – ubrudzony, poplamiony, umazany (dirty from)

ink – tusz

At school, lefties might be given extra assignments to practice their handwriting to catch up with other students who apparently have made bigger progress since their i's are dotted and their t's are crossed while lefty handwriting sucks.

extra assignments – dodatkowe zadania/ ćwiczenia (extra homework/ work)

to catch up with somebody – nadgonić zaległości w stosunku do (to reach the same quality or standard as someone or something else)

since – ponieważ (because)

to dot the i's and cross the t's – dopracować szczegóły (to pay a great deal of attention to the details of something, especially when you are trying to complete a task)

Thank heavens, I was spared this indignity. What I didn't avoid, though, was extra scissors practice. Yes, you heard me correctly. Frigging scissors! One day my teacher noticed that my scissors handling skills were pathetic and she told me to practice those skills by cutting out pictures from magazines. Little did she know that I would never do it regularly. Before each deadline, I would sit down and spend an hour cutting out random pictures from the magazines from my grandma's stash with close to no effort ;)

thank heavens – dzięki bogu (thank god)

be spared something – komuś oszczędzono czegoś (when you are spared something you don't have to do or experience it)

indignity – upokorzenie/ zniewaga (embarrassment)

frigging – głupie (used to give more force to an expression of anger)

to handle something – obchodzić się z czymś ( to operate something)

pathetic – żenujące (embarrassing)

a stash – zapas/ kryjówka (a secret place where something is hidden or stored )

with close to no effort – prawie bez wysiłku (almost not trying)

But, fear not, there are some perks to being left-handed. One just should not hesitate to put them to good use. I myself always play the I'm left-handed card to get out of boring duties

fear not – nie obawiajcie się (don't worry)

perks – korzyści (advantages)

to hesitate – wahać się (to pause before you do or say something, often because you are uncertain or nervous about it )

to put something to good use – robić dobry użytek z czegoś (to use something to your advantage)

to play the ….. card – używać wymówki (to use an excuse)

get out of – wymigać się od robienia czegoś (to avoid doing something that you do not want to do, especially by giving an excuse)

- Can you wrap those presents, Karolina?

- I'm afraid I can't. I'm left-handed.

- Can you lay the table?

- Sorry, I can't. I'm left-handed. I'm always confused about where all the forks and knives go.

- Can you iron these clothes here?

- Sorry, I can't. The cord on the steam iron is on the wrong side.

to wrap – zapakować

a cord – przewód (a wire)

a steam iron – żelazko z nawilżaczem parowym

I guess, that's all I have to say on the subject ;)

I hope that after reading this post you will go and hug the lefties in your life and tell them how much you appreciate their effort ;)

See you in my next post!

Karola